Happy 1st Birthday!

We celebrated Ellie's first birthday a few days ago. Our little birthday girl started out happy when she got her way too pink car seat (fourth children get practical birthday gifts at our place).

Then it was time for cake (fourth children with feeding problems and an overwhelmed mom get cupcakes). Ellie wasn't quite sure about this situation.

She got sticky frosting on her hands and all the happy feelings went away.
Next, we loaded up the family to go see Christmas lights at Thanksgiving point. As soon as we got into the lights, Ellie was so excited that she promptly fell asleep. The end.

Ellie's birthday celebration seemed a little anticlimactic after all that our family has been through during her first year of life. The past few days I have been thinking about all the years we waited for her, her three surgeries & recoveries, her developmental delays & feeding challenges, the long nights spent sleeping (sort of) by her crib, the tears, the prayers, the uncertainty of her future. The emotion that comes as I reflect on her life is surprising to me. It is gratitude. I am so thankful for this little person who turned my life upside down! I am thankful for the love she has brought to our family. I am thankful for the person I am becoming as I care for her. I am thankful to know that no matter what happens, she is a part of our family forever. I could go on and on, but I think I'll go to bed instead! Maybe going to sleep will help me forget that she officially said her first word today. It was "Dada." (So much for all the time I spend with her!) Then, I think about the smile this word brought to her dad's face. Maybe I can continue to be grateful after all...